Ruthie (from Queen of the Late Bloomers) Post #1 Timing Is Everything
My main problem this summer is convincing my best friend, Kelli Jenkins, we need to take serious action in our mission to becoming popular or else we risk starting high school as anonymous as we were in middle school.
“Timing is everything,” I keep telling Kelli, but she just doesn’t get it. These upcoming summer months are absolutely critical to ensuring we start high school with at least some social cred. Unfortunately, I have some things besides Kelli dragging her feet working against me and my grand plan to becoming popular by the time school starts in the fall.
First obstacle: my brother, Mike, leaves for the Air Force the middle of June and I’m freaking out. I’ll miss him for sure, but I’ve come to an even more disturbing realization. Once Mike leaves, I’ll be alone . . . with Mom. So, technically, not alone, but still, by myself with Mom, and this is likely to be pretty ugly.
What I’m hoping for this summer is that Mom will take up gardening or scrapbooking or some other mom-hobby. Or, God forbid, she finally gets some friends to occupy her time. My fear, once Mike’s gone, is that she’ll turn all her attention to me, which I do NOT need while I’m making strategic moves in the summer social scene.
Since my dad died back when I was 8, it’s been the three of us. And, so far, I’ve been flying under Mom’s radar. And when I don't, thankfully Grandma Elle – she’s my mom’s mom – usually has by back. But since the New Year’s Eve incident, I’ve barely seen her. Every time I ask Mom where Grandma Elle is, she says (always in her mom voice that sounds half annoyed, half condescending):
“Ruthie, your grandma’s swamped with her Mary Kay business. If you really think about it, I’m sure you can understand why she’s not spending as much time with you.”
When she puts it like that, I’m almost convinced, but if I “really think about it,” I’m skeptical. Something’s up with Grandma; I just don’t know what it is.
Second obstacle: Kelli is going to church camp again this summer, but not just for one week like she does every year. No, this summer, of all summers, she’s decided to go for two full weeks right smack dab in the middle of June. This means two crucial weeks of summer will be utterly wasted because there’s no way I’ll be going anywhere alone. Duh, that would be social suicide.
What’s more, Kelli will be gone when Mike leaves for the Air Force. Like I said, I’m really freaking out about this, and knowing Kelli will be completely incommunicado is not helping my stress level. Plus, I have no idea how my mom will handle him leaving, but I doubt we’ll be having any deep mother-daughter talks about it. That’s not my mom’s style or mine. So, while Kelli is in church camp purgatory, I’ll be by myself dealing with telling Mike good-bye and no idea of when I’ll see him again.
Third obstacle and this is huge: I’m about to turn 15, and I have yet to start my period. So, I’m stuck in the same body I’ve had since 4th grade, featuring an absolutely concave chest. Kelli started her period over Christmas break, which by the way, I consider the best Christmas present ever. It sounds weird, but I swear her body immediately started filling out in all the right places - if you know what I mean.
I’m well aware there’s nothing I can do to change when mother nature decides it’s time for me to start my period, but it’s torture watching girls my age and younger develop physically and socially. I’m no expert, but even I know there’s a direct correlation between a girl starting her period and her social life. Kelli says having your period is the worst thing ever, but I think she’s just trying to make me feel less lame.
So, those are the new things I’m dealing with this summer, along with the regular on-going ones: my fair skin that burns and won’t tan, unless you count the freckles that splotch up my entire face as tanning (I do not); my undefined brownish-reddish-dirty blondish hair that on a good day is wavy, but most days is just a frizz ball; and who could forget the fact that I have a dead dad and a single mom.
To mark the end of middle school for us and my birthday, which happened to be the same day this year, my mom took Kelli and me shopping. This is not something my mom usually does. She’s not that kind of mom. Shopping with Kelli is usually fun, but let's just say, my experience trying on swim suits will forever rank up there among one of the most embarrassing moments of my life.
And I have my mom to thank. She apparently thought it would be funny to call me “Queen of the Late Bloomers” in front of the sales lady, who, looked like she could be a model on the cover of Cosmo.
Then, maybe because Mom felt guilty for humiliating me, she did two unexpected, slightly miraculous things. First, she let me get a two-piece swimsuit that has a pretty fair amount of padding in the top. And then she said I could spend the night with Kelli even though it was my birthday and Mom always says that birthdays are for family only.
There may be a God for prepubescent girls after all.
A little past 1:00 am curled up in sleeping bags in Kelli's basement, Kelli agreed to help me create a list of things to do this summer, all guaranteed to move us up the social ladder. Forty-five minutes later, here’s what we (and by “we,” I really mean “I”) came up with:
1. Go to parties. Even if they’re at Chrissy Fletcher’s house. (Kelli hates Chrissy).
2. Hang out at Columbian Park Pool and the Igloo Ice Cream Palace as much as possible. (But never, ever with my mom or Kelli’s parents or any other adult for that matter).
3. Learn every top 40 pop song on the radio. (Even though I really prefer oldies and hard rock and Kelli likes country and classical, we know this one is critical).
4. Seriously consider quitting basketball. (Even though we both had fun with it in middle school, A side note - I also advised Kelli to quit orchestra, but she said that’s a deal breaker. So, it’s not technically on the list).
5. Do not be seen in the public library or reading anywhere outside the privacy of our homes, and do not under any circumstances admit we are doing the summer reading for 9th grade English honors class. (Even though we both love reading and one of our favorite things is our highly exclusive two-member book club).
So, that’s a glimpse into the life of Ruthie Elizabeth Lohrman. Feedback and advice welcome, especially if it relates to my grand plan for moving up the social ladder of high school.